Necessary Endings Summary – February 2022

Author: Henry Cloud

Short Summary
Necessary Endings (2011) is a self-help book in which the author has emphasized cutting off the unnecessary roots whether it’s the rose bush, people, or a job. The author motivates the readers to end the toxic situations which drain them. It will get you peace at the end of the day.
necessary endings
Source: amazon.com

Detailed Summary

Necessary Endings is an extremely inspiring book written by Henry Cloud. The book motivates the readers to stop dealing with toxic people, jobs, or any situation that is not worth their efforts and time. He has given some examples to help readers better understand the importance of necessary endings.

Sometimes we are stuck in a situation where ending it feels even more difficult than dealing with it. Whether you are stuck in a toxic relationship where only you are making efforts to stay together or a job that gives you anxiety and a feeling of unsatisfaction when you come back home. But whatever the situation is, it’s important to realize your worth. Moreover, if it’s not giving you peace of mind, it’s better to end it as soon as possible.

Henry Cloud has guided the readers to come out of a situation that drains them and destroys their mental peace.

Necessary Endings Key Points

Pruning some relationships helps to grow

Just like pruning a tree or a bush helps them to grow healthy, in the same way pruning a relationship also helps to grow a healthy relationship in the future.

When we prune a bush, it might seem weird to cut it back but eventually, the bush will grow healthier and more vibrant after pruning. For instance, a rose bush grows healthier and more colorful when it is pruned properly.

This teaches us a lesson that sometimes we need to believe in our decisions and their outcomes. It might feel difficult for you to take a step and end it but it will eventually be fruitful for you in the future. Try to take decisions like the gardener who thinks about the healthy and vibrant rosebush when he prunes the bush.

Besides this, we need to take inspiration from Jack Welch. He is the former CEO of General Electric. His life struggles and how he made difficult business decisions but they proved fruitful to him. He canceled many business ventures which he felt are unproductive. And after canceling the result was that the company’s market value raised from $14 billion to $410 billion which is a huge success.

These examples teach us that taking a necessary step at the right time is essential and will prove beneficial in the future. Another piece of advice is to always focus on the outcome of the difficult decision positively.

Change is hard but change is good

Sometimes, we don’t come out of a difficult situation even after realizing it is not worth it but still, we try to stay there. This is because we don’t like to adopt changes. This is human nature that we don’t feel comfortable in a new environment or a change.

We like staying in our comfort zones so we continue making efforts and try to improve ourselves instead of ending the relationship. But the writer says that change is good even though it’s hard.

To advocate this, he shares the example of a CEO who runs a business selling chairs. You are trying hard to manage your company. And one day you get to know there comes an opponent who is selling chairs at lower prices. Moreover, he has better quality chairs. In that situation, you want to cut off your current suppliers. This can be a difficult move but you need to change the suppliers so that it will be profitable for your business.

But before making this decision, you need to sit and talk to yourself. Ask yourself what you are deciding right now will be a better move in the future or not. And most importantly be true to yourself.

Communicate, break the barriers and end the relation

The book Necessary Endings is an eye-opener for people who are in a toxic relationship or in a difficult situation. We have a misconception that everything remains forever but forever is a lie. Everything has to end. Sometimes we don’t end a relationship even if it destroys our mental peace because we are obsessed with the idea of being in love and not the people we are in love with. Ending a relationship is hard but not impossible.

All you need to do is to first figure it out that its worth your efforts or not. Then try to communicate. Be clear about what you want and what you expect from this relationship. Then give them some time to make a decision. If it meets your expectations then stay and invest your time. But if not then run and move on. Focus on yourself and build a better life.

Who would I recommend the Necessary Endings summary to?

 The book is recommended to the young generation who are investing time and effort in the wrong people. Moreover, a person who is in abusive marriage and thinks this is the end of life needs to read this book and realize the importance of necessary endings for a better and peaceful life.