The Gifts of Imperfection Summary – May 2022

Author: Brené Brown

Short Summary
The Gifts of Imperfection (2010) is a book on self-acceptance by the author, public speaker, and podcaster Brené Brown. The Gifts of Imperfection teaches you to be real in a world where everyone is faking it, from looks to emotions. It will influence you to become your greatest self while staying true to who you really are. This book is full of advice that can help you in each stage of your self-love journey.
the gifts of imperfection summary
Source: amazon.com

Detailed Summary

Every day we get scared. To look like we are naturally so we put on makeup, every day we get scared to show how we are feeling so we put on a happy and brave face, every day we are scared to admit that we failed at something, so we hide our failures from others. We hide behind filters, small talk, badges, and honors on our tables and we form an image of ourselves. A secure, successful, brave, and beautiful image that is perfect in every way and that is where we go wrong. No one among us can achieve true success if we do not become honest and vulnerable. That requires hard courage but if we truly embrace ourselves it can be one of the greatest things that we can do. When we accept that imperfections are a part of our lives we free ourselves from the burdens of expectations and standards. It is only then we can begin our journey toward self-love. So be proud of yourself and be perfectly imperfect!

The Gifts of Imperfection Summary Key Points

Authenticity is one of the best choices we can make

Being real is one the hardest things in a world where every second person is constantly judging you on minute and major things relevant to you. From the colors of your skin, how you look, what you wear, what you like, who you hang out with to what career to choose and how you spend your free time. People constantly judge and evaluate you. With a bulk of negativity around it gets harder to be vulnerable and put ourselves out there in this careless world. But you need to be real in order to truly understand your destiny and where you stand. When you need honest and let others see you for yourself they get a chance to know and love the real you. In doing so, you also influence and encourage so many other people to be authentic indirectly. You need to be brave and courageous to become authentic.

Healthy Striving vs Perfectionism

It may appear that perfectionism generates positive results. That’s not the case. It is the need to do everything perfectly and get perfect results but as humans, we are not perfect and not everything we do can generate perfect results. When we go into performing a task with the mentality of a perfectionist we often fail and this leads to depression and low self-esteem. Perfection is not the same as striving to be your best. On the other hand, healthy striving allows you to set realistic goals, have realistic expectations, and work hard in a healthy way. Healthy striving will not lead to anxiety and restlessness, life paralysis, or depression-like perfectionism. Striving and working hard towards your goals with patience and honesty will definitely get you near success.

Hold People Accountable

While the author constantly advises us to be true and honest, she also advises us to set healthy boundaries. If we fail to set healthy boundaries and hold people accountable for their actions and words we are just setting ourselves for heartbreak. Protect yourself and know when to say no and say it firmly. The people who love you for the ‘real you will not be intimidated by your boundaries, choices, and by hearing no. You only need genuine people in your life who have good intentions for you as you have for yourself. Stay true and surround yourself with people who stay true to you as well.

Give Thanks

The secret to attracting more is the be thankful for what you have been already blessed with. Find little things in your everyday life that contribute to your joy and comfort in any way. When you try to be grateful for things around you, you will start to find things inside you that make you special and it will lead to you becoming happier with yourself, your qualities, and your imperfections. Gratitude can help you overcome your past trauma and get over the victim’s mindset. Rather than worrying about what you do not have, be thankful for what you have. It can be something as simple as witnessing a child laughing, having a good cup of coffee, or meeting an old friend. Try to find joy!

The Gifts of Imperfection Quotes

“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.” –Brené Brown

“We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.” –Brené Brown

The Gifts of Imperfection Summary Review

This book is like a giant hug being offered on a day when you feel sad. It has got some of the greatest tips on accepting ourselves. It will teach you to be true to your values and self. Furthermore, it shows that concealing one’s real personality and emotions can never lead to growth. So be free, feel free and be honest about who you are. Take the burden of societal expectations and put it off your shoulders.

To Whom I Would Recommend The Gifts of Imperfection Summary

  • To the fourteen-year-old looking at others while walking down the hallway in school and thinking she is not good enough.
  • The twenty-eight-year-old employee trying to be more authentic to himself while chasing his goals.
  • To anyone who has begun their journey towards self-improvement and is in need of some love.

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