The Way of Integrity Summary – How to Emotionally Healing?

Author: Martha Beck

Short Summary
The way of Integrity (2021) is a psychological guide on how to find yourself through integrity. Moreover, the book helps the readers heal themselves and stay true to themselves through a four-step process.
the way of integrity

Detail The Way of Integrity Summary

“At the deepest level, you know what makes you happy and how to create your best possible life. That knowledge is coded into your very nature. But your nature is forever colliding with a force that can tear it apart: culture.”
― Martha Beck

The book “The way of Integrity” is written by Martha Beck, who teaches that integrity is the key to a happy and meaningful life.

Martha has helped the readers be true to themselves in her book. Especially helped those who are healing and trying to move on from the relationship that did not work out. Because sometimes, when we are in a toxic relationship, we lose ourselves, making our suffering even worse.

So, the book helps readers find themselves again and restore who they are. Moreover, the book presents a four-step process through which we can find integrity. The 4-step process is helpful for those moving on and will provide a sense of purpose. The author has shared the journey of Dante’s classic hero in order to understand the 4-step process.

The Way of Integrity Summary Key Points

Are you lost in your worries, confusion, and wilderness? Are you the people-pleaser who hurts your own feelings in the end?

Things never felt in the beginning, whether they are sorrowful emotions or anger. They have a mild impact on our minds and body, and we cannot figure them out. But with the passage of time, things get real and worse.

It is true that when we follow a path that does not match our moral principles, we lose our real purpose of joy and happiness. Read the following detail to get rid of all the suffering and discomfort by accepting integrity.

Integrity helps in Healing

“To be in integrity is to be one thing, whole and undivided.”
― Martha Beck

Even if you are stuck in a toxic relationship and want to move on or a friend who abandoned you in the middle of nowhere, or if you are in any past trauma that is making your mental health bad, then integrity is the cure for your sufferings.

Integrity nowadays has a slightly different connotation than it did in the past, which was to remain entire or unbroken. A plane with integrity, for example, will fly smoothly through the air because all of the pieces are functioning properly and concurrently. If it loses its integrity, it may crash. It’s the same old story.

We put off how we actually feel or what we truly want in order to meet social expectations, and as a result, we become exhausted, depressed, and even sick. We suffer because we are out of sync with ourselves when we do things that aren’t in line with who we truly are.

Your work, on the other hand, will absorb you if you are cognitively, physically, and spiritually linked. As a result, you’ll like spending time with them. So, if you want to become who you truly are and live a more fulfilling life, Dante’s world is calling to you.

Acknowledge that you are lost

“listening to our inner teacher is the most important skill we need to follow the way of integrity.”
― Martha Beck

The book motivates us to acknowledge that we are lost. This is because when we figure out that we are losing ourselves, only then will we be able to find ourselves again. Moreover, the author says that we should let go of the things that are causing us pain.

The book shares how Dante initially encounters the Dark Wood of Error on his journey. This is where you begin your journey toward integrity. You’re feeling isolated, and you’re not sure how you got here. Because we live in a paradox, we experience this inner fog.

Out of the four steps, the first step to getting out of the woods is to admit you’re lost. You’ll probably face problems like the sad wolf (depression), the terrible lion (panic), and the voracious leopard if you do this (neediness). Find an instructor to help you progress. Yours could be discovered through counseling or even yoga. Learn to pay attention to your most important teacher: your inner self.

Begin by concentrating on the present moment. You’re about to enter the Inferno. This is the dreadful location where offenders are sentenced to eternal punishment. When we aren’t genuine to ourselves, we all experience an internal firestorm. Dante’s tutor, Virgil, urges him to watch the demons, interrogate them, and then move on.

For us, this involves identifying which ideas are causing us pain and determining whether or not they are true. Let go of it if you realize it isn’t. It might be difficult and frightening to let go of incorrect beliefs. To get out, you must travel to the inferno’s heart, which has a freezing lake filled with liars.

Lying, according to Dante, is like being encased in ice. You grow numb and lonely when you lie to yourself. The deeper you plunge into your sorrow, the sooner you’ll stop sliding down and start rising. You’ll start to believe that you’re both deserving and adored.

How to find Paradise

The book tells us that we can find paradise when we live to our truths. And for that, we have to match our behaviors with our inner truths. The first step is to forgive yourself for the instances when you have lied to yourself.

The second step is to place a high value on the things you’ve done in the past that have helped you become who you truly are. The more you do this, the more integrity and compassion will become a permanent part of your life, indicating that you are wired for happiness.

This is explained in the book through Dante’s journey. Dante emerges from the Inferno to find himself at the foot of a massive mountain. Purgatory is where you’ll spend the rest of your life. Purgatory is where repentant people undergo various chores to earn their passage to heaven. Your new way of thinking should have alleviated your suffering by now, but now it’s time to match your words with your deeds.

It’s also time to put your past behind you and commit to your truth. This entails acting and thinking in a way that is consistent with your values. This could imply that you stop laughing when a co-worker offers an improper joke. It will be a significant adjustment, so allow yourself time to mourn your previous life if necessary.

You might like to read the book The Happiness Trap Summary.

Who would I recommend The Way of Integrity Summary to?

The way of Integrity is recommended to those who want clarity of purpose in their life. Moreover, those who are struggling to move on and are in the process of healing should read this book.

The Way of Integrity Summary - February 2022

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