Author: Martha Beck
|The way of Integrity (2021) is a psychological guide on how to find yourself through integrity. Moreover, the book also helps the readers to heal themselves and stay true to themselves through a four-step process.|
The book “The way of Integrity” is written by Martha Beck who teaches a lesson that integrity is the key to a happy and meaningful life.
In her book, Martha has helped the readers to be true to themselves. Especially helped those who are healing and trying to move on from the relationship that did not work out. Because sometimes, when we are in a toxic relationship, we lose ourselves which makes our suffering even worse.
So, the book helps the readers to find themselves again and restore who they really are. Moreover, the book presents a four-step process through which we can find integrity. The 4-step process is helpful for those who are moving on and it will provide a sense of purpose. The author has shared the journey of Dante’s classic hero in order to understand the 4-step process.
The Way of Integrity Summary Key Points
Integrity helps in healing
Even if you are stuck in a toxic relationship and want to move on or a friend who abandoned you in the middle of nowhere or if you are in any past trauma that is making your mental health bad then integrity is the cure for your sufferings.
Integrity nowadays has a slightly different connotation than it did in the past, which was to remain entire or unbroken. A plane with integrity, for example, will fly smoothly through the air because all of the pieces are functioning properly and concurrently. If it loses its integrity, it may crash. It’s the same old story. We put off how we actually feel or what we truly want in order to meet social expectations, and as a result, we become exhausted, depressed, and even sick. We suffer because we are out of sync with ourselves when we do things that aren’t in line with who we truly are.
Your work, on the other hand, will absorb you if you are cognitively, physically, and spiritually linked. As a result, you’ll like spending time with them. So, if you want to become who you truly are and live a more fulfilling life, Dante’s world is calling to you.
Acknowledge that you are lost
The book motivates us to acknowledge that we are lost. This is because when we figure out that we are losing ourselves only then we will be able to find ourselves again. Moreover, the author says that we should let go of the things that are causing us pain.
The book shares how Dante initially encounters the Dark Wood of Error on his journey. This is where you begin your journey toward integrity. You’re feeling isolated, and you’re not sure how you got here. Because we live in a paradox, we experience this inner fog.
Out of the four steps, the first step to getting out of the woods is to admit you’re lost. You’ll probably face problems like the sad wolf (depression), the terrible lion (panic), and the voracious leopard if you do this (neediness). Find an instructor to help you progress. Yours could be discovered through counseling or even yoga. Learn to pay attention to your most important teacher: your inner self. Begin by concentrating on the present moment. You’re about to enter the Inferno. This is the dreadful location where offenders are sentenced to eternal punishment. When we aren’t genuine to ourselves, we all experience an internal firestorm. Virgil, Dante’s tutor, urges him to watch the demons, interrogate them, and then move on.
For us, this involves identifying which ideas are causing us pain and determining whether or not they are true. Let go of it if you realize it isn’t. It might be difficult and frightening to let go of incorrect beliefs. To get out, you must travel to the inferno’s heart, which has a freezing lake filled with liars. Lying, according to Dante, is like being encased in ice. You grow numb and lonely when you lie to yourself. The deeper you plunge into your sorrow, the sooner you’ll stop sliding down and start rising. You’ll start to believe that you’re both deserving and adored.
How to find paradise
The book tells us that when we live to our truths, we can find paradise. And for that, we have to match our behaviors with our inner truths. The first step is to forgive yourself for the instances when you have lied to yourself. The second step is to place a high value on the things you’ve done in the past that have helped you become who you truly are. The more you do this, the more integrity and compassion will become a permanent part of your life, indicating that you are wired for happiness.
This is explained in the book through Dante’s journey. Dante emerges from the Inferno to find himself at the foot of a massive mountain. Purgatory is where you’ll spend the rest of your life. Purgatory is a place where repentant people undergo various chores in order to earn their passage to heaven. Your new way of thinking should have alleviated your suffering by now, but now it’s time to match your words with your deeds.
It’s also past time to put your past behind you and totally commit to your truth. This entails acting and thinking in a way that is consistent with your values. This could imply that when a co-worker offers an improper joke, you stop laughing. It will be a significant adjustment, so allow yourself time to mourn your previous life if necessary.
Who would I recommend The Way of Integrity book to?
The way of Integrity is recommended to those who want clarity of purpose in their life. Moreover, those who are struggling to move on and are in the process of healing should read this book.